My husband is obviously NOT the man of my dreams.
Literally.
Experts say that dreams are essentially the SpinArt of our thoughts. Mine might begin like this: a dash of teaching. A speckle of excitement about a pedicure. A big glob of worry that I won't get the auto insurance paper work done. A dab of Dan. A blob of laundry. And a pinch of scrambled eggs for good measure. Drop them on the paper. Swirl. And voile! I dream that I am doing laundry on the morning of my first day of work. Suddenly, the dryer starts convulsing! I open the door cautiously, and an army of small feet marches out of the dryer. I follow them up the stairs, where my dining room has been transformed into a mechanic shop. Cars are being painted in every color of nail polish imaginable. I really like that hot green sparkly number, to be honest... And that's when he hits me! Square in the face with a balloon filled with eggs and bacon. Even in my dreams, he is such a clown... That's my Dan... in a diaper... because he's now... a... baby?
Yes, that, my friends, is the magic of dreamworld.
The dreams started a little before my wedding. Dan and I were on our honeymoon in Jamaica, where we had decided to go on a tour of the local falls. Something felt fishy to me, but I couldn't figure out what. When we reached the top of the falls, sure enough, the tour guides showed their true colors. They were bandits and wanted our money. Well, being the heroes that we naturally are, Dan and I looked at each across the rock, and gave the understood signal. We then lunged at the marauders, temporarily disabling them, and made our getaway. We knew we needed to get to the airport, but it was clear that this was more than just a local brawl. Someone in the government knew we here....and they wanted us dead!
I never did get to see what happened to us on that trip, but I assume we figured out some daring way to get home. We usually do...
That particular dream was one-in-a-million for me, simply because Dan was actually in it. Any dreams I've had since then have been single missions. I pretty much spend all of my dreams these days looking FOR Dan. Sometimes we're at his graduation. Except that I have to attend the ceremonies with one of his friends because he never shows up. Sometimes I'm waiting to watch a movie or play with him, but he's in his dorm sleeping. Once, the beach on which I was relaxing was suddenly overtaken by half-robot-half-human soldiers. They handed out soft drinks to us while they prepared us for the coming attack. I told the kind red-headed soldier that I couldn't find my husband, who was also a soldier. Please, if he could, tell my husband that I love him! That's when the ground began to move- it began to BREATH! As I lay on my stomach in the sand, trying to shield my little sister from the statue of John F. Kennedy that had arisen from the depths of the earth, I could FEEL the choppers pulsing through my body. "Where are you, Daniel? Where are you Daniel? Where are you Daniel?"
And I woke up.
My favorite Disney princess once sang, "A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep." I agree with her! Because every night I wish my husband would stop fooling around and just come back to bed. Every night he sends me on a wild goose chase to find him, and I long for the day when he'll sit still for 5 minutes and let me give him a piece of my mind!
She also sings, "In dreams you will lose your heartache... whatever you wish for, you keep!"
Well, see that's the problem with these movies, friends. They lie. Like in every chick flick, the main female character just happens to be walking in a beautifully blooming garden where her hair just happens to be fluttering gorgeously around her flawless face; and as she just happens to sigh and look up with a longing glance, Prince Charming, who is from the outer farm regions of Zambia, just happens to be walking by. He kneels, whips out a sparkling diamond, and they live happily ever after. I've been sitting in this blooming living room for hours now, and noooo Prince Charming, people!!
I think that my husband must have sensed my frustration.
Just a few nights ago, I was in the middle of showing my friend Esther the fabulous - and deeply discounted- shoes I had found for her at Target. Just then, my phone went off. I was yanked from dream world and sleepily said, "Hello....?"
And there, of all people, was the man of my dreams!
And I heard my Prince Charming.
And we talked happily ever after for 30 minutes.
And I was reminded that "no matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dream that you wish will come true."
:)
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Monday, May 2, 2011
This one's for the boys...
One yellow chick. One black spider.
Two beaded keychains down. Eight more to go.
And then my Dan comes HOME!
The "keychain countdown" isn't our first. Our original countdown was Dan's idea. For my 24th birthday, I received a huge care package full of ... interesting... birthday gifts, including a jar full of gold and silver Hershey's Kisses. On the lid was a note: "The Kiss Countdown- take out one silver kiss in the morning and one gold kiss at night. When there are no more kisses left, it's time to get married!" Well, I didn't need the silver tiara that he also sent to feel like a princess!
Dan asked me a few days before he deployed if I would like another countdown. As I multiplied 9.5 months by 31 days, I despairingly explained that that was just too many days to count down, and could we please go home so I could climb under the bed and never come out again until he returned... except for meals... because I need food. A lot. Dan then came up with a great idea! A beaded key chain kit. He painstakingly counted out 2 beads for each day, then figured out which animal combinations would best fit into the total number of beads needed. After he organized them into a little container, he felt pleased that he had done his very best to provide for my emotional needs for the next months. As I examine the list of remaining animals and settle on a metallic dragonfly, I realize that he may have been on to something.
My husband gets his romantic side honestly. Apparently, the Filcik boys are pretty schooled in the grace. It wasn't uncommon for Mom Filcik to find an "I LOVE YOU" note scraped into the top layer of a new jar of peanut butter. And Lindsay said she'd marry Sam after she turned to the last page of the scrapbook he had made her, and found a ring inside the little 3-D box cut into the book. Even John is honing his skills: he sent me an adorable package before my wedding with all sorts of thoughtful gifts, like a make-your-own-candy-kaleidescope, a box of tissues (I was a little emotional those days), a grow-your-own-pet-reindeer, and an action thriller book for our honeymoon (which I actually stayed up late to read the night before I walked down the aisle). And, I imagine the fire that demolished Joe's room recently had something to do with the absentmindedness that comes with a new crush;) Yes, Dan has had good training over the years...
As I was cleaning out my room this week, I realized just how blessed I am to be married to a closet romantic. Under my night stand, I found a little piece of yellow paper that said, "I miss you already." This was one of a set of 8 little yellow papers that I found scattered all over our house after Dan left for training in Missouri. In my closet I unfolded a pair of "Ironman" pajama pants that Dan had left me "so I could wear them when I missed him over the summer." (I've been working on his ego ever since.) I've already written about the Disney princess posters that he hung in his apartment, but I may not have mentioned the potpourri basket that he bought for the bathroom, or the gel letters that he stuck onto the mirror to spell 'princess.' On my dresser are his Airborne wings that he ceremoniously pinned onto my T-shirt the day he took my skydiving and we both survived. I could go on, but the items really do get more embarrassing..
Probably the best gift he left me, though, is a journal. Not one for me to write in. One that he kept FOR me. It's been a little over a year since Dan first asked me to try out being "more than friends." In that time, it seems we've barely been together. We both graduated. I left for Florida. He stayed at West Point. I left for Canada. He went to Airborne school in Georgia. He went to training in Missouri. I stayed in NJ to teach. We got married and were together for 10 days. He went to Texas. I didn't. He left for Afghanistan. I ate a whole gallon of Rocky Road ice cream. (no, not really!) Throughout those months, he was writing. And drawing. And occasionally scrapbooking in that hot green journal. Not a single entry went by in which he didn't tell me that he loved me and thought I was gorgeous. And for the first two weeks that Dan was gone in Afghanistan, I read that journal every night. I cried each time. But, it meant the world to me to have a piece of him there. I think sometimes we say things in writing that we forget to say in everyday conversation. I learned things about my husband through his writing that I might not have known otherwise.
His thoughtfulness has been a gift to me.
So, boys, listen up! This one's for YOU! You don't have to be Shakespeare or Bruno Mars or a Filcik to be romantic. You don't have to spend loads of money on expensive jewelry or flowers, though those gifts are nice too... it's as simple as picking out the red M&Ms and making a heart on her pillow... or sending her a link to a special song on Youtube... or holding her hand in public. It could be as simple as making the bed in the morning- without even being asked!
Just show her that she's special to you...
...and Dan, if you're reading this, I really like new books...they make me feel special...just so you know;)
Two beaded keychains down. Eight more to go.
And then my Dan comes HOME!
The "keychain countdown" isn't our first. Our original countdown was Dan's idea. For my 24th birthday, I received a huge care package full of ... interesting... birthday gifts, including a jar full of gold and silver Hershey's Kisses. On the lid was a note: "The Kiss Countdown- take out one silver kiss in the morning and one gold kiss at night. When there are no more kisses left, it's time to get married!" Well, I didn't need the silver tiara that he also sent to feel like a princess!
Dan asked me a few days before he deployed if I would like another countdown. As I multiplied 9.5 months by 31 days, I despairingly explained that that was just too many days to count down, and could we please go home so I could climb under the bed and never come out again until he returned... except for meals... because I need food. A lot. Dan then came up with a great idea! A beaded key chain kit. He painstakingly counted out 2 beads for each day, then figured out which animal combinations would best fit into the total number of beads needed. After he organized them into a little container, he felt pleased that he had done his very best to provide for my emotional needs for the next months. As I examine the list of remaining animals and settle on a metallic dragonfly, I realize that he may have been on to something.
My husband gets his romantic side honestly. Apparently, the Filcik boys are pretty schooled in the grace. It wasn't uncommon for Mom Filcik to find an "I LOVE YOU" note scraped into the top layer of a new jar of peanut butter. And Lindsay said she'd marry Sam after she turned to the last page of the scrapbook he had made her, and found a ring inside the little 3-D box cut into the book. Even John is honing his skills: he sent me an adorable package before my wedding with all sorts of thoughtful gifts, like a make-your-own-candy-kaleidescope, a box of tissues (I was a little emotional those days), a grow-your-own-pet-reindeer, and an action thriller book for our honeymoon (which I actually stayed up late to read the night before I walked down the aisle). And, I imagine the fire that demolished Joe's room recently had something to do with the absentmindedness that comes with a new crush;) Yes, Dan has had good training over the years...
As I was cleaning out my room this week, I realized just how blessed I am to be married to a closet romantic. Under my night stand, I found a little piece of yellow paper that said, "I miss you already." This was one of a set of 8 little yellow papers that I found scattered all over our house after Dan left for training in Missouri. In my closet I unfolded a pair of "Ironman" pajama pants that Dan had left me "so I could wear them when I missed him over the summer." (I've been working on his ego ever since.) I've already written about the Disney princess posters that he hung in his apartment, but I may not have mentioned the potpourri basket that he bought for the bathroom, or the gel letters that he stuck onto the mirror to spell 'princess.' On my dresser are his Airborne wings that he ceremoniously pinned onto my T-shirt the day he took my skydiving and we both survived. I could go on, but the items really do get more embarrassing..
Probably the best gift he left me, though, is a journal. Not one for me to write in. One that he kept FOR me. It's been a little over a year since Dan first asked me to try out being "more than friends." In that time, it seems we've barely been together. We both graduated. I left for Florida. He stayed at West Point. I left for Canada. He went to Airborne school in Georgia. He went to training in Missouri. I stayed in NJ to teach. We got married and were together for 10 days. He went to Texas. I didn't. He left for Afghanistan. I ate a whole gallon of Rocky Road ice cream. (no, not really!) Throughout those months, he was writing. And drawing. And occasionally scrapbooking in that hot green journal. Not a single entry went by in which he didn't tell me that he loved me and thought I was gorgeous. And for the first two weeks that Dan was gone in Afghanistan, I read that journal every night. I cried each time. But, it meant the world to me to have a piece of him there. I think sometimes we say things in writing that we forget to say in everyday conversation. I learned things about my husband through his writing that I might not have known otherwise.
His thoughtfulness has been a gift to me.
So, boys, listen up! This one's for YOU! You don't have to be Shakespeare or Bruno Mars or a Filcik to be romantic. You don't have to spend loads of money on expensive jewelry or flowers, though those gifts are nice too... it's as simple as picking out the red M&Ms and making a heart on her pillow... or sending her a link to a special song on Youtube... or holding her hand in public. It could be as simple as making the bed in the morning- without even being asked!
Just show her that she's special to you...
...and Dan, if you're reading this, I really like new books...they make me feel special...just so you know;)
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