Monday, May 2, 2011

This one's for the boys...

One yellow chick. One black spider.
Two beaded keychains down. Eight more to go.

And then my Dan comes HOME!

The "keychain countdown" isn't our first. Our original countdown was Dan's idea. For my 24th birthday, I received a huge care package full of ... interesting... birthday gifts, including a jar full of gold and silver Hershey's Kisses. On the lid was a note: "The Kiss Countdown- take out one silver kiss in the morning and one gold kiss at night. When there are no more kisses left, it's time to get married!" Well, I didn't need the silver tiara that he also sent to feel like a princess!

Dan asked me a few days before he deployed if I would like another countdown. As I multiplied 9.5 months by 31 days, I despairingly explained that that was just too many days to count down, and could we please go home so I could climb under the bed and never come out again until he returned... except for meals... because I need food. A lot. Dan then came up with a great idea! A beaded key chain kit. He painstakingly counted out 2 beads for each day, then figured out which animal combinations would best fit into the total number of beads needed. After he organized them into a little container, he felt pleased that he had done his very best to provide for my emotional needs for the next months. As I examine the list of remaining animals and settle on a metallic dragonfly, I realize that he may have been on to something.

My husband gets his romantic side honestly. Apparently, the Filcik boys are pretty schooled in the grace. It wasn't uncommon for Mom Filcik to find an "I LOVE YOU" note scraped into the top layer of a new jar of peanut butter. And Lindsay said she'd marry Sam after she turned to the last page of the scrapbook he had made her, and found a ring inside the little 3-D box cut into the book. Even John is honing his skills: he sent me an adorable package before my wedding with all sorts of thoughtful gifts, like a make-your-own-candy-kaleidescope, a box of tissues (I was a little emotional those days), a grow-your-own-pet-reindeer, and an action thriller book for our honeymoon (which I actually stayed up late to read the night before I walked down the aisle). And, I imagine the fire that demolished Joe's room recently had something to do with the absentmindedness that comes with a new crush;) Yes, Dan has had good training over the years...

As I was cleaning out my room this week, I realized just how blessed I am to be married to a closet romantic. Under my night stand, I found a little piece of yellow paper that said, "I miss you already." This was one of a set of 8 little yellow papers that I found scattered all over our house after Dan left for training in Missouri. In my closet I unfolded a pair of "Ironman" pajama pants that Dan had left me "so I could wear them when I missed him over the summer." (I've been working on his ego ever since.) I've already written about the Disney princess posters that he hung in his apartment, but I may not have mentioned the potpourri basket that he bought for the bathroom, or the gel letters that he stuck onto the mirror to spell 'princess.' On my dresser are his Airborne wings that he ceremoniously  pinned onto my T-shirt the day he took my skydiving and we both survived. I could go on, but the items really do get more embarrassing..

Probably the best gift he left me, though, is a journal. Not one for me to write in. One that he kept FOR me. It's been a little over a year since Dan first asked me to try out being "more than friends." In that time, it seems we've barely been together. We both graduated. I left for Florida. He stayed at West Point. I left for Canada. He went to Airborne school in Georgia. He went to training in Missouri. I stayed in NJ to teach. We got married and were together for 10 days. He went to Texas. I didn't. He left for Afghanistan. I ate a whole gallon of Rocky Road ice cream. (no, not really!) Throughout those months, he was writing. And drawing. And occasionally scrapbooking in that hot green journal. Not a single entry went by in which he didn't tell me that he loved me and thought I was gorgeous. And for the first two weeks that Dan was gone in Afghanistan, I read that journal every night. I cried each time. But, it meant the world to me to have a piece of him there. I think sometimes we say things in writing that we forget to say in everyday conversation. I learned things about my husband through his writing that I might not have known otherwise.

His thoughtfulness has been a gift to me.

So, boys, listen up! This one's for YOU! You don't have to be Shakespeare or Bruno Mars or a Filcik to be romantic. You don't have to spend loads of money on expensive jewelry or flowers, though those gifts are nice too... it's as simple as picking out the red M&Ms and making a heart on her pillow... or sending her a link to a special song on Youtube... or holding her hand in public. It could be as simple as making the bed in the morning- without even being asked!

Just show her that she's special to you...

...and Dan, if you're reading this, I really like new books...they make me feel special...just so you know;)

3 comments:

  1. I loved this one jussley! I am praying for you every day!! <3

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  2. What a special guy you have! You've provided food for thought not only for the men folk, but also for long-time married ladies such as myself :) Sometimes it is the little gestures of love that can mean so much.

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